Saturday, June 8, 2019

Scrupulosity (Religious OCD): The Real Reason behind the Scrupulous One’s Obsession with Sin


Constantly plagued with the fear of committing sin and of falling short, the scrupulous person enjoys no peace. How can such a one ever find freedom from such torment? Knowing the root cause of our fear and anxiety is invaluable to getting well. Otherwise we don’t really fully understand why we fear sin so much. It is vital to get a revelation of the sound doctrine and to become convinced of it: We are right with God not because of our perfect performance and self-righteousness but through saving faith in Jesus Christ. It is a whole new covenant. A whole new way of living. A whole new righteousness from what was previously prescribed (faith vs. law). It makes it much easier to get well when we know exactly what is at the source of our torment. And, that way, we know what we really need to repent of and renounce in order to get lasting victory. The root cause of our fear and anxiety needs to be fully exposed and brought to light so that we can efficiently deal with it and experience permanent freedom.

The reason why the scrupulous person is so obsessed with sin and morals is because he believes his salvation is dependent upon his being able to be sinless and morally perfect in thoughts, deeds and actions at all times. He fears that any one given committed (or perceived) sin makes him worthy of hell if not dealt with promptly and on time. Every day, he frets over sin for fear that he might die before he has had the time to confess a sin or for some, before he has had the time to make things right through compulsions or rituals. Sin is a real threat to him. Hence the fear, double-mindedness, doubts and the thorough quest of the scrupulous one to find out whether he is in sin, whether what he is doing is sinful and whether there is hidden sins in his life. I remember being tormented with the “system” of confession; I feared that if I didn’t have time to confess one sin before I died, I would end up in hell as a result. Confessing my sins had become a law to me. After all, doesn’t the Bible teach us that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (see 1 John 1:9)? I began to realize through in-depth study of Scriptures that Christ in me was my hope of glory (see Col. 1:27), and my hope was not my perfect performance or my carefully ensuring that not one sin went unnoticed. God was to be my keeper (see Psalm 121:5) and He would let me know if there was something in my life in need of change. Of course, we need to confess and turn from known sins, but not legalistically out of fear of going to hell if we don’t. Instead, we confess our sins and turn from them out of intimacy with and love for God and yes, out of reverential fear of the Lord. But there is a difference between reverential fear and the spirit of fear. The latter isn’t of God (see 2 Timothy 1:7). The Bible says that God hasn’t given us the spirit of bondage again to fear, but the Spirit of adoption by which we cry Abba! Father! (See Rom. 8:15). We now can approach God as our heavenly Father through Christ, not as a perfectionistic and merciless judge.

The scrupulous individual’s salvation depends on his ability not to sin and/or on his ability to make acceptable atonement for his sin (through confession, rituals or compulsions). This is the law. This is old covenant. However the Bible states that the law doesn’t rest on faith (see Gal. 3:10-14). This is a scary thing given that the Word of God tells us that only faith in Christ Jesus can save us (see Rom. 5:1, Rom. 10:9, Eph. 2:8-9, Phil.3:9 and Gal. 2:16). The law is powerless to save us from our sins and it can’t make anyone morally perfect. In fact, the law strengthens sin (see 1 Cor. 15:56). Legalism has the appearance of godliness, but it denies the very power of Christ and Christ crucified. Legalism obscures the reality of Christ crucified. Someone bound with legalism finds it hard to understand what Jesus’ work at Calvary means to them and to their right standing with God. Legalism is very deceptive because it has an appearance of godliness. After all, what’s wrong with trying hard not to sin? It appears very pious and righteous. However, not so before God because the scrupulous person’s effort not to sin stems from rebellion, unbelief and pride. There, the legalist has placed his trust in the law (any law) and in his own ability to meet it somehow. Again, the Bible says that we are made right with God through faith in Christ. And the beautiful thing is once we receive the free gift of righteousness through faith in Jesus, we are empowered to live righteously, from glory to glory. We cannot produce what we don’t have. So we are made righteous freely first and then we are enabled to produce righteousness. We must be made right through faith first. And there, we are changed from the inside out.

The ironic thing is what the scrupulous individual fears the most has come upon him. His sinful reliance on self and on a law along with his faithless motivation behind trying hard not to sin and be righteous (the motivation being to avoid hell and go to heaven) is what earns him a ticket to hell. And why is that so? It is because deep down, His faith and reliance isn’t in and on Jesus but in and on his own self-righteousness. He tries to be perfect and sinless in order to save himself or to stay saved. He no longer trusts in Christ’s work at the cross for his salvation. He has fallen from grace.

“If you seek to be justified and declared righteous and to be given a right standing with God through the Law, you are brought to nothing and so separated (severed) from Christ. You have fallen away from grace (from God’s gracious favor and unmerited blessing).”―Galatians 5:4 AMPC

And because such a one is trying to earn his salvation through perfect performance and his own ability to do everything right, he will never measure up to God’s righteous standard for holiness. We can’t save ourselves. Jesus is our only hope. The Bible clearly says that there is only one way to heaven and that is through saving faith in Christ. The legalist has switched his allegiance to a law and someway, somehow, he must comply with it perfectly at all times. What labor! What heavy burden! He submits to the law (any law, or any moral law) and no longer to Christ. And there he keeps control over his life. This is legalism. There is no mercy under the law dear one. Grace is our only hope. At the root of legalism (scrupulosity) is rebellion (see Galatians 3:1 KJV), doubt and unbelief (i.e. not trusting in the finished work of Christ) and pride (if one can earn it, one can boast, but not so before God; see Eph. 2:8-9). Ritualism and compulsions performed in order to temporarily appease or reduce anxiety and in order to cancel or pay for sin is pure legalism; relying on rituals, works and self-effort to earn forgiveness and righteousness. God despises self-righteousness and works of the flesh.

As born-again Christians, we pursue righteousness out of love for God, love for righteousness and out of a hate for sin. We serve God because we are saved, not in order to get or stay saved. The driving force of our pursuit for holiness shouldn’t be a fear of going to hell. If this is our motivation, then we have turned from Christ to the law and we need to repent and come back to Christ. We also need to revisit our foundational belief system and doctrine.

Lastly, the legalist lacks a revelation of the real and intimate love of God for him personally. He needs a deep revelation of God’s love and he needs to receive that love by faith if he wants to get well.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. [I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls.] Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls. For My yoke is wholesome (useful, good—not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant), and My burden is light and easy to be borne.”―Matthew 11:28-30 AMPC

Be encouraged dear one, there is hope! There is a way out.

―Kathleen Kaczmarek

Friday, March 15, 2019

Scrupulosity


The guilt-ridden consciencethe chronic fear to sin, to be evil, or that what one is doing or not doing might be sinful or morally wrong.

Scrupulosity is a tormenting inner state where there is no rest for the soulwhere an unmerciful and dreaded verdict is heard over and over again: “guilty!” The only safe place for the scrupulous one is the place of moral and/or religious perfection. But the scrupulous person wonders with fear: “Is what I am doing right now sinful?” “Have I done enough?” “Is my performance good enough?” “Is my work good enough?” “Am I praying enough?” “Should I fast longer or more frequently?” “I should be reading the Bible right now.” “Do I perform all of the church expectations perfectly?” “Are the words I speak the right ones?” “Am I representing Christ well enough?” “How about the morals I must comply with?” “What if I feel jealousy?” “And how about if I am not kind enough?” “How do I know whether I love others and if I love them enough?” “What happens if I lose my temper and don’t have time to confess it and die?” “I fear that I am evil, of the devil, of darkness.” “Did I really repent enough?” “Did God really hear me when I confessed my sin?" “How do I know for sure that I am forgiven?” “I feel condemned and guilty.” “I can just see God, disappointed in me. I can just see His frown.” “I am concerned I will end up in hell.” “I am trying God! I really want to do what’s right! I really want to make it in!”

Constantly plagued with the fear of committing sin and of falling short, the scrupulous person enjoys no peace. Is there a way out of this ever-doubting state, double-mindedness, and distressful inner turmoil? Yes, I can assure you that there is. Why can I be so sure? I am sure because a lot of what you just read above represents where I was a number of years ago. Really, the burden of my salvation rested on my shoulders. I had to somehow make sure that I kept up with all of the moral and religious expectations. Someway, somehow, I had to try really hard to be righteous if I wanted to remain saved. I had, through my own abilities, to comply with all of the righteous requirements necessary to make it in. But even those, I wasn’t really sure what they all were, not really. Because after all, what if I unknowingly didn’t comply with some? What if I missed one? What if I was unaware of some? How could I know all of the conditions and holy requisites needed to secure my salvation and entrance into heaven? What if my righteousness fell short of perfection? How could I measure my righteousness and know for sure I was good enough to make it in? What a lonely and self-centered place; trying to fight for my own safety and survival, alone. What an uncertain place. And what a troubling place.

I had reached such a catastrophic place that by the time I cried out to God back in 2011, I hadn’t slept for 3 or 4 days and I was experiencing numerous panic attacks, day and night. The anxiety I felt was extreme. But one day, while driving home from work, I cried out to God. Everything in me cried out. “God! What is wrong with me?” I knew He heard me. That night, praise be to God I was able to fall asleep. The Lord gave me two dreams in response to my cry. Both dreams led to the same diagnostic. Though what I was experiencing was classified as scrupulosity or religious OCD by the medical field, these are not the terms the Lord used. He went deeper. He touched the very root of my problem. If we only seek to get rid of the fruits, but won’t deal with the root, the root will always end up producing other branches and the unwanted fruits of fear, guilt and anxiety will reappear. We must deal with the core issue; we must deal with the root cause of our anxiety if we ever want the anxiety to go. Mind you, it may not happen overnight. I know it didn’t for me. But if we will persevere in the truth of God’s Word and in trusting God, it is only a matter of time until we begin to experience the long awaited relief from all of the fear, anxiety and torment associated with scrupulosity.

That night, our Heavenly Counselor revealed to me that the real core problem in my life was legalism. Legalism had grown to infect my entire life. My belief system was infected and my mind was totally corrupted as a result. The scary thing was my trying so hard to secure my salvation was the very thing that was robbing me of it. Through seeking to be justified by my own self-righteousness, my worst fear had come to pass. Galatians 5:1-6 (NKJV) accurately summarizes what the Lord showed me that night:

“Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage. Indeed I, Paul, say to you that if you become circumcised, Christ will profit you nothing. And I testify again to every man who becomes circumcised that he is a debtor to keep the whole law. You have become estranged from Christ, you who attempt to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace. For we through the Spirit eagerly wait for the hope of righteousness by faith. For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision avails anything, but faith working through love.”

Through trying to earn my salvation by my own works and self-righteousness, I had fallen from grace. You see, we only have two options: Either we will seek to be made right with God through complying with moral and religious law, or we will seek to be made right with God freely through faith in Christ, but we can’t have both. We must choose the means by which we will obtain righteousness. Will it be through striving or by freely receiving? The first originates from pride, the other from godly humility. Hebrews 9:14 (NKJV) says: “How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without spot to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God?” The Blood of Christ is powerful enough to purge our conscience from guilt and condemnation so that we can be free to serve the Lord, not out of guilt and self-serving motives, but out of a love that springs forth out of a sincere faith, a clear conscience and a pure heart (see 1 Timothy 1:5). If we are under a constant sense of guilt and condemnation, it indicates we need to earnestly examine our core belief system. Somewhere in there, we believe our right standing with God depends on our works and self-righteousness. There can be no rest there. However, Hebrews 4:3a (NKJV) says: “For we who have believed do enter that rest.” If we are not experiencing rest, we must seriously ask ourselves those hard questions and be willing to face the truth and repent. Legalism is another gospel, not that there is another gospel.

I understand how troubling this blog may be to some of you. Your first reaction may be, “I should have never read this blog! I feel worse now!” Believe me, I felt the same way, too. Part of me thought, “God, how could you do this to me!” Yet, I would never have been free had I not known the truth. I needed to repent from submitting to the law and not to Christ. The law had come between Christ and I and all He wanted was for me to come home. God is quick to forgive. Simply come to Him and confess that you have switched your allegiance to the law and tell Him you are sorry and that you repent. He will forgive you immediately. From there, you will enter a journey of recovery from legalism with Jesus on your side, where, as you trust Him and place your hope in His Word, He will lead you out of legalism step by step. But remember, you will not come out of legalism the way you came inyour way out will be through reliance upon Him and His Word.

Be encouraged dear one, there is hope! There is a way out.

Kathleen Kaczmarek

“O foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you that you should not obey the truth, before whose eyes Jesus Christ was clearly portrayed among you as crucified? This only I want to learn from you: Did you receive the Spirit by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun in the Spirit, are you now being made perfect by the flesh? Have you suffered so many things in vain—if indeed it was in vain? Therefore He who supplies the Spirit to you and works miracles among you, does He do it by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith?—just as Abraham “believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness.” Therefore know that only those who are of faith are sons of Abraham. And the Scripture, foreseeing that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, preached the gospel to Abraham beforehand, saying, “In you all the nations shall be blessed.” So then those who are of faith are blessed with believing Abraham. For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse; for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who does not continue in all things which are written in the book of the law, to do them.” But that no one is justified by the law in the sight of God is evident, for “the just shall live by faith.” Yet the law is not of faith, but “the man who does them shall live by them.” Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law, having become a curse for us (for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree”), that the blessing of Abraham might come upon the Gentiles in Christ Jesus, that we might receive the promise of the Spirit through faith.”Galatians 3:1-14 NKJV